On Finding Understanding

I received an unexpected text from my 15 year old sister a couple Fridays ago. It read:

"Are we supposed to wait until after high school to have a boyfriend?"

Uhhh.... I wasn't sure exactly how to answer this one.

Here's the deal: Emily had spent the week at EFY (a youth church camp). While there, one of the speakers led a pretty in depth discussion on dating. In the LDS church, we have been given a lot of standards and guidelines when it comes to teen dating.  These standards are given to us by modern prophets, and are published in a booklet called, "For the Strength of Youth."  The speaker my sister heard at EFY understood these standards differently than she had, causing her to feel a little bit conflicted.



Seeing that this conversation was not one that could be properly texted, we agreed to meet during her free time.


I wasn't sure what I expected this conversation to be, but what actually happened has kept me thinking for days. Emily led out with a firm,"I want to follow the prophet" kind of attitude. Her idea was not to push the boundaries of the church, but rather to correctly understand the principles in that pamphlet, so that when she began dating, she would be in line with what the prophets have said.

We surprisingly never nailed down the specifics of what was or wasn't appropriate when it came to teenage dating. Most of our conversation was spent discussing how she should go about researching this topic. We talked a great deal about study, prayer, and attitude. In the end, her mindset was the same as in the beginning, "I want to follow the prophet."

"Don't take lightly the feeling you get of love for the prophet of God. Wherever I go in the church, who ever the prophet is at the time, the members will ask, 'When you get back to church headquarters, will you please tell the prophet how much we love him?' That is far more than hero worship or the feelings we sometimes have of admiring heroic figures. It is a gift from God. With it, you receive more easily the gift of confirming revelation when he speaks in his office as the Lord's prophet. The love you feel is the love the Lord has for whoever is His spokesman." -Henry B. Eyring (Continuing Revelation, Oct 2014.)

Emily's trust in these men comes from a witness borne of the Spirit that they are representatives of Jesus Christ. I can tell that she feels that. And that's why I think her attitude was one of seeking understanding instead of defiance.

Her unwavering trust in these men of God strengthened my own conviction.

Later that day, I would go home, get on Facebook, and see the Supreme Court's ruling on gay marriage.

The more I reflected on this experience, the more it struck me what had really happened with Emily that day.

Emily had set herself on a path of dedication to God. When I was fifteen, the topic of dating was extremely important to me, as it is to her now. And there are a lot of details that people have varying opinions on. I remember also being thoroughly confused.

Emily's choice to clear her confusion by researching the words of prophets through study and prayer is going to benefit her for the rest of her life.... Because, one day, the topics of discussion are going to be ones of a much grander scale. When faced with controversy in the future, the opinions will be more fierce, and the consequences more far-reaching.

When I got home Friday and scrolled through my Facebook feed, I read article after article, each posted by someone I care about. Some felt that legalizing gay-marriage was a great step forward for our nation, while others felt devastated, disgusted, and threatened. As rainbow-stripped profile pictures and "straight-pride" posts littered my wall, I found peace as I looked to the men I sustain as prophets.

The leaders of the church released this official statement that Friday:

"The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints acknowledges that following today's ruling by the Supreme Court, same-sex marriages are now legal in the United States. The Court's decision does not alter the Lord's doctrine that marriage is a union between a man and a woman ordained by God. While showing respect for those who think differently, the Church will continue to teach and promote marriage between a man and a woman as a central part of our doctrine and practice."

Trust.

As I read these words, I was reminded how much I trust the men I sustain as prophets. And peace. I felt that too.

These themes of seeking clarity and understanding seem to be reoccurring ones as of late, and I assume that pattern will only continue. The legalization of same-sex marriage is not going be the last controversial issue that we face. I am grateful, however, for the opportunity it has given me to research the words of those I sustain as prophets, pray for clarity, and finally trust in the Savior.

And so, by the end of this, the issues of teen-dating and same-sex marriage didn't seem so different to me after all. The particulars, of course, are different, but the path of finding peace and understanding was the exact same.

Both required research, prayer and trust.

So that's my take-away.



As a side note, of the articles I read, this is the one that proved most enlightening:   http://www.millennialmormons.com/your-choice-supporting-gay-marriage-or-supporting-gay-members/

#sharegoodness

Earlier today I was watching a video of some country stars singing "Silent Night." It was a beautiful rendition, but by the third verse I found myself critiquing nearly every thing the artists did. "She has too much twang here,"  "She should have let the other artist hit the high notes," "You know, I never really did like so-and-so very much anyways." By the end of the verse the realization hit me like a ton of bricks.
"Do you think HE cares?"
If the Savior were listening to these three women, would He care that one of their dresses was a bit drab? Would He care that the artists took a little liberty with the melody? Would He care if the harmony was predictable? No. No, I don't think He would.
 I think, if He were in the audience that night, or if He were the one on the other side of my laptop, He mostly would have just been really grateful. He would have been really grateful that in the world of fame, fortune, and beauty, there were still these three women who really believed in Him, and despite the negative influences around them, loved Him enough  that they wanted to use their careers to spread His message of peace and joy. He would have listened to that harmony, grateful that these women understood what He meant when He asked us to magnify our talents. As He watched the audience, He would be able to tell the moment that the Spirit had delivered the quiet assurance that this Christmas message was true. He would have already thought of all the times the video could potentially be posted online, and the influence it could have in that sphere.
And then the fourth verse started. Now, my pride having gone down quite a ways, I better appreciated the last verse. I was grateful to these women, and the way they had invited the Christmas Spirit into my morning. And so I give kudos to them. Way to #sharegoodness.

http://faithtap.com/2154/clarkson-yearwood-and-mcentire-sing-silent-night/

picture from http://www.pinterest.com/pin/281052832969678520/

I Lived in Heaven a Long Time Ago

One of the truths I hold most precious is that I am a child of a Heavenly Father, and that I lived with Him before I was born. In fact, we all did.

Before any of us came to this earth life, we lived as spirit children of our Heavenly Father, or God. As God told the prophet Jeremiah, "Before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee, and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations" (Jeremiah 1:5).

Just as God knew and had a plan for Jeremiah, He has a plan for each of us too.



"We do not know many details about life in that premortal sphere, but we do know some. Our Heavenly Father has revealed to us who He is, who we are, and who we can become.

Back in that first estate, you knew with absolute certainty that God existed because you saw and heard Him. You knew Jesus Christ, who would become the Lamb of God. You had faith in Him. And you knew that your destiny was not to stay in the security of your premortal home. As much as you loved that eternal sphere, you knew you wanted and needed to embark on a journey," said Dieter F. Uchtdorf. To help us learn and grow into all we could be, God created a plan for us. In this plan, you "would depart from the arms of your Father, pass through a veil of forgetfulness, receive a mortal body, and learn and experience things that hopefully would help you grow to become more like Father in Heaven and return to His presence.

In that sacred place, surrounded by those you knew and loved, the great question on your lips and in your heart must have been 'Will I return safely to my heavenly home?'" he continued.

I get chills every time I read that statement. What that time must have felt like... There we stood on the edge of eternity, excited for our new adventure. I imagine the relief we must have felt when we learned that we would not go to earth alone, but that we would be blessed with families to help us along the way. We would also have the gift of prayer, enabling us to communicate with our Father. God would even bless us with prophets who would act as guides as we went through our journey.

Mostly, I imagine the overwhelming calmness that we must have felt when we learned that Jesus Christ would be our Savior. This was our older brother, and we trusted Him. We knew of His kindness, of His dedication to our Father, and of His unfailing love. We desperately needed a Savior, and we knew He would not fail us.


Painting by Liz Lemon Swindle.

The Lord revealed to the prophet, Abraham, more truth about our life before this.

"Now the Lord had shown unto me, Abraham, the intelligences (that's us) that were organized before the world was; and among all these there were many of the noble and great ones; And God saw these souls that they were good, and he stood in the midst of them, and he said: These I will make my rulers; for he stood among those that were spirits, and he saw that they were good; and he said unto me: Abraham, thou art one of them; thou wast chosen before thou wast born" (Abraham 3:22-23).

God had confidence in us. He knew life on earth would be a struggle, full of heartbreaks and accidents, but He also knew that we had good souls. Though we would not remember our heavenly home, our spirits would be able to recognize truth when they felt it. We would be able to face our challenges with courage, and if we would choose to look toward the Savior, Jesus Christ, we would come out victorious.

God's purpose in all of this is clear, He has told us "Behold, this is my work and my glory--to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man" (Moses 1:39).

Knowledge of my pre-earth life has given me peace and perspective throughout my life. I know who I am, I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father. I know that my Father has a great plan for me, just as He did Jeremiah and Abraham. In moments of hardship, I fall back on these truths. I know that through this plan God created for us, we will be able to return to live with Him, our Savior, and our families for eternity. And I can't think of anything better than that.

"In the end, you knew God would be just—that His goodness would triumph. You had participated in the great heavenly councils and knew that your Savior and Redeemer, Jesus Christ, would provide a way for you to be cleansed from sin and rescued from physical death. You had faith that, in the end, you would rejoice and join your voice with a heavenly chorus singing praises to His holy name" said Dieter F. Uchtdorf.

To learn more about God's plan for you and your family, comment, message me on FaceBook, or visit http://mormon.org/beliefs/plan-of-salvation

God is Love :)

On this day of love, may we all remember the love our Father in Heaven has for us.
 

"For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - Romans 8:38-39
 

"God is love."- 1 John4:8

"Oh all ye that are pure in heart, lift up your heads, and receive the pleasing word of God, and Feast upon his love; for  ye may, if your minds are firm, forever." - Jacob 3:2.


Each day I am taught more and more just how aware of us God really is. He is in the details of our lives. I absolutely know it. 

"God does notice us, and He watches over us. But it is usually through another person that He meets our needs. Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other... in the Doctrine and Covenants we read about how important it is to 'succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees' (D&C 81:5). So often our acts of service consist of simple encouragement or of giving mundane help with mundane tasks- but what glorious consequences can flow from small but deliberate deeds." -Spencer W. Kimball.

My challenge to you today, help someone else feel God's love for them! Find a need and fill it!

It's Valentine's, so let's SPREAD the LOVE!

Hold to the Ground You've Already Won.

Just before I left on my mission, someone very dear to me expressed some concerns they were having with their faith. They had so many unanswered questions, so many things they didn't understand...And it broke my heart to see this person struggling.

Throughout my mission, I have seen this same problem over and over. The Gospel of Jesus Christ provides many answers for the honest in heart, but it does not tell us every mystery of heaven at first glance. Faith and patience are required.

The counsel I gave this dear friend of mine, and the counsel I give to all who may be struggling is this:

"In moments of fear or doubt or troubling times, hold the ground you have already won, even if that ground is limited." -Jeffery R. Holland

We do not always understand why a loving Heavenly Father allows certain trials in our lives. We do not always understand what He is trying to teach us, or why our faithfulness seems to be so slow to be rewarded or answered. But we must not lose the spiritual witnesses of truth we have already gained. And surely, answers will eventually come. We must hold to the ground we have already won.

And so in the meantime we do all we can. We remain faithful. We read our scriptures and pray. We continue to seek guidance. We work as hard as we can. And then we wait in faith. And we look to the source of truth and light.

"Let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed" (D&C 123:17).

Jeffery R. Holland continues:
"When those moments come and issues surface, the resolution of which is not immediately forthcoming, hold fast to what you already know and stand strong until additional knowledge comes...The size of your faith or the degree of your knowledge is not the issue—it is the integrity you demonstrate toward the faith you do have and the truth you already know."

To all those who may feel forgotten, or like the Lord is not answering their prayers, I plead with you to be patient, to remain faithful, and to hold to the ground you've already won. I testify that we do have a Father in Heaven who loves us and is so aware of us. He does hear our cries, and He will answer them in His own time. 

"For a small moment have I forsaken thee, but with great mercies will I gather thee. In a little wrath I hid my face from thee for a moment, but with everlasting kindness will I have mercy on thee, saith the Lord thy Redeemer. For the mountains shall depart and the hills be removed, but my kindness shall not depart from thee" (3 Nephi 22:7-10)

If any of you are having a hard time recognizing answers to your prayers, or feel forgotten by God, message me on Facebook, let's talk about it and try to find answers together.

For a link to the rest of this INCREDIBLE talk by Jeffery R. Holland, click here :)

It Matters to Him

"All through my life the counsel to depend on prayer has been prized above almost any other advice I have received. It has become an integral part of me, an anchor, a constant source of strength, and the basis for my knowledge of things divine." -Ezra Taft Benson

Like Ezra Benson, prayer played a big role in my upbringing.

Each morning of my childhood started off with a prayer and a hug before I ran out the door to head to school. Throughout the day, my family would pray before we ate dinner, drove long distances, or started various family outings. It  also wasn't uncommon for me to come up the stairs morning or night, and see my parents kneeling at their bedside praying together.

Nighttime family prayers were always my favorite, though.

Each day of my childhood was closed with my family kneeling together in prayer. With the TV paused, the books put down, and the texting left to the side, we'd all rush up the stairs to gather around my parent's bed or the family room couch for family prayer. Rarely would we miss a night of this tradition.

My parents went through a lot of effort to instill this pattern of prayer in their children, and whenever I sought counsel for a problem, my mom's advice was generally to pray about it.

The spring I turned 15, I was having a hard time finding a swimsuit that I thought was tasteful and modest. As summer came closer and closer, I started feeling a little panicked.  I had been raised with high standards of modesty, and I felt like I had been on a thousand swimsuit websites and in a million stores (in reality, probably only two), and there was nothing that would fill my modesty requirements as well as my budget. It sounds like such a silly concern, but I feared being trapped in a granny-suit all summer long. One night, as I was fretting over the issue, my mom finally told me to just go and pray about it. She said, in effect, "Audrey, tonight when you pray, tell your Heavenly Father what is going on. If this is truly important to you, it will be important to Him, and He will help you find a modest swimsuit." So I did. I prayed and asked Heavenly Father to help me find a modest/cute/affordable swimsuit when I went shopping the next day.

The following morning, my mom took my sister and me to a little boutique we had heard good things about. I walked in, and lo and behold, the very first suit I tried on was modest, was moderately priced, and was pretty darn cute...It seemed to be nothing short of a small miracle.

It was such a simple and silly request--"Please Heavenly Father, help me find a cute swimsuit for the summer,"--but it really meant a lot to me. This experience strengthened my testimony that someone was listening to my prayers.

Since that spring, Heavenly Father has continued to make Himself manifest to me in answers to my prayers. For me, answers have come in many different ways. Sometimes its a feeling of comfort; other times it's an encouraging word from a close friend; or perhaps I'll be having a really hectic day with a million deadlines to meet, and somehow the pieces fall into place at the last minute. Whether I need clarity, comfort, encouragement, direction, stress relief, or peace, Heavenly Father has never failed to answer my heartfelt pleas.

Prayer has been a blessing and strength to my life. It is a gift from a loving God. He knows us, and we can come to know Him as we spend time with Him through prayer.

If any of you are struggling with prayer, are not sure how to recognize answers to your prayers, or even aren't sure how to pray, message me on Facebook. :) Let's talk about it.

Create a Holy Place

Just over a year ago, a woman named Ann M. Dibb (one of the leaders in the LDS faith) gave a talk about the Holy Places in our lives. She talked about how "holy places" can be geographical locations such as church buildings, temples or homes. She acknowledged that places can be distinct conditions, positions, or states of mind. She said,  "This means holy places can also include moments in time—moments when the Holy Ghost testifies to us, moments when we feel Heavenly Father’s love, or moments when we receive an answer to our prayers. Even more, I believe any time you have the courage to stand for what is right, especially in situations where no one else is willing to do so, you are creating a holy place."

After reading this talk, I contemplated the "holy places" in my life.  I thought about the moment when I knelt on my bed and prayed after I finished the Book of Mormon for the first time. I also thought about the places in my home town I used to go to sort out my thoughts when I was troubled, like the walking path behind my  parents' house. One of my favorite holy places is the area rug in my childhood home where we said countless nighttime prayers as a family.  Other holy places included the high school newspaper room, the first time I played the violin in church, and the sidewalk outside my college dorm where I said "no" to things that I knew where not right. Each of these places and moments shaped a part of my character and strengthened the conviction of my testimony.

Over the course of my mission, I've continued to find holy places. A holy place was found in the tears on my cheeks after we were dropped by my favorite person to teach. Another was found in feeling happy and at home around the table of a family I fell in love with. It is a strange feeling to look down a street and know exactly which homes have copies of the Book of  Mormon, which homes  you have prayed with after they have recently lost a loved one, or which homes felt the Spirit when you testified of the love and redeeming power of our Savior. In this regard, even an entire street can become a holy place.

I love thinking about the actual paths the Savior walked and the holy places He created there. I can only imagine being one of Christ's original disciples and remembering the corner where Christ healed the blind, the alley where the woman with the issue of blood reached out to touch the Savior's robe, or the tomb where Christ raised Lazarus from the dead. His life was absolutely filled with holy places because He filled His life with holy things... I'm sure as a child He spent time studying the words of the prophets, and many nights on His knees seeking for direction from His Father in Heaven.

All of these holy places prepared our Savior for that night in the Garden of Gethsemane where He would "tremble from pain...bleed from every pore...and suffer both body and Spirit" (D&C 19:18) in our behalf. Here, the Savior gave all He had to the Father. Through His sacrifice and love expressed in this holy place, we too can overcome the negative affects of sin.

My point in all of this...We all have the power to CREATE holy places. Elaine S. Dalton said, "I truly believe that one virtuous young woman or young man, led by the Spirit, can change the world."

Spencer W. Kimball, a prophet in the 70s and 80s, once said, "God does notice us, and He watches over us. But it is usually through another person that He meets our needs.  Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other...In the Doctrine and Covenants we read about how important it is to 'succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees' (D&C 81:5).  So often our acts of service consists of simple encouragement or of giving mundane help from mundane tasks--but what glorious consequences can flow from mundane acts and from small but deliberate deeds."

On the back of my nametag, I have written "create a holy place," and I pray each day that Heavenly Father will help me do that.

We all are blessed with unique gifts and talents that Heavenly Father has given to us to bless others, and those moments when we're blessing others' lives and magnifying our own gifts are sacred.  So whether you spend extra time in the scriptures or on your knees, share your testimony with a friend, or serve a perfect stranger, my challenge to you is to create a holy place today.